Curmudgeonly Contemplations

What's wrong with 'yes'?

2009-11-26T21:20:00.001-08:00

I've noted a strange new affectation in speech over the past year. A conversation might go like this:

"So have you got that data yet?"

"Correct"

And did it show the relationship we predicted?"

"Correct"

What the heck happened to that most basic English affirmation 'YES'? When did it disappear? Did someone suddenly decide that bigger words are better than smaller words? Is someone out there waging an anti 'yes' campaign? I'd have thought that in these days of text language, and the resultant simplification (or dumbing down, or 'bastardisation') of our language, a shorter word like 'yes' would find favour over that much longer word 'correct'.

What's wrong with 'yes'?

There they go again...

2009-11-26T01:41:00.001-08:00

'Flippin' 'eck'!!! .. There, on the radio, a prominent and successful local (Christchurch) car sales owner announces that 'There has been considerably less cars imported".

This man has successfully weathered the worst financial crisis in 80 years in an industry that has seen heavy casualties, is a strong supporter of the community, and provides excellent sales and after sales service: my daughter bought a car from one of his yards, and is very happy with the car and the service.

But two simple words seem to defeat him...."less" and 'fewer".. one imports 'fewer' cars.. since cars are discrete countable items. There also seems to be an issue with the verb "to have", but that's yet another story.

I am even more appalled that the radio station copywriter who organized the advertisement allowed this to slip through.

What's going on here guys? I can almost forgive the car sales owner, but as for you radio copywriters!! This is your profession, you are meant to be word smiths. How about a touch of professional pride here? How about just doing your jobs????

On 'tenter hooks'..

2009-11-21T19:57:00.001-08:00

While I'm on a roll about misuse of our language, here's another one that REALLY irks me.

We aren't on 'tender hooks', we are on 'tenter hooks'.

I'm not some sort of linguistic purist or evangelist ...., but I really get irritated by the constant misuse of language, especially when those who do so are so forthright in arguing that they are right ....Grrrrrrrr

I'd DIE for DICE

2009-11-21T15:06:00.000-08:00

Dear Games Workshop (TM, C etc etc)

Yep, you certainly do design and produce some of the nicest miniatures around; they've been good enough to ensnare me in your games web, nice work. You obviously employ some of the best sculptors and figure painters around, no doubt about that.

Shame you couldn't do the same with 'Wordsmiths'. Are you trying to single handedly evolve the English language? Doing a 'Bill Gates/Microsoft' perhaps?

Those little cuboid shapes we throw onto our games tables, you know the ones, they have the numbers 1 to 6 on them, or little indentations on each face varying between 1 and 6, and we throw them - Dice.

That's the one, well, guys, 'dice' is a plural noun. Its singular is 'Die'. You throw dice when there are two or more of them. Roll one of them and you roll a die....

Now, really, how hard can it be? English I'd assumed was your native tongue, after all you are based in England.

One of them is a die, two or more of them are dice. Now get your editors to scurry away into their little corners and write that out 1000 times.. by morning .... or someone will cut you XXXXXXX off.. (allusion to Monty Python 'The Life of Brian' etc etc)

And while we're talking...

2009-11-14T23:16:00.000-08:00

.... about supermarkets (and other retailers), how can you have 'cheaper prices'? We don't as a rule buy and sell prices, so how can they be cheaper?

We could have 'lower prices'.. yep that works, but cheaper prices? This isn't evolution of the language, these guys are 'murdering' it.

really...

Less or Fewer??

2009-11-14T17:07:00.000-08:00

My local supermarket seems to have failed junior High School English. Well, to be more precise, I have serious doubts about whether any of the staff ever passed junior High School English. A sign at their check-outs proudly announced that they were charging for plastic bags so that we would consume 'less plastic bags'. The sentiment, and the policy, are just fine by me.. they have my total support.

BUT: does anyone ever proof read their signs? Perhaps I should ask 'Does anyone who knows anything about the English language and its grammar ever proof read their signs? I'm no expert on English grammar, but there are some things I do know, and one of those is when to use 'less' and when to use 'fewer'.

It's FEWER bags, guys, not LESS. Use FEWER when referring to something that comes as discrete units, things you can count one by one, like bags, people, animals, cars.

Use LESS when referring to something that is 'continuous' in its nature, like less water, less wine, less rubbish. You'd say less beer, but fewer bottles of beer.

This is NOT hard... stop demolishing the English language just because you don't know any better.